Lightbulb Joke Contest: Win a Copy of “Insider Secrets To Marketing Your Business On The Internet”
Written by Rosalind Gardner on November 28, 2007 · Comments (37)
Filed Under Contests ·
Here’s your chance to win a copy of the Internet Marketing Center’s “The Insider Secrets to Marketing Your Business on the Internet - Version 2007” ($197 value). The course contains TWO 8″ x 11″ full-color three ring binders containing 800+ pages, broken down into 64 easy-to-follow lessons about everything from traffic generation, email marketing and Google Adsense.
This is the course that every new Internet marketer should have in their office… regardless of whether you plan to become an affiliate, merchant or online auction seller.
So… to put it on YOUR desk… we’re gonna have some fun with lightbulb jokes.
And just in case you’ve never heard a lightbulb joke, they go like this:
- How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?
Two. One to screw it in and one to screw it up. - How many cops does it take to screw n a lightbulb ?
None. It turned itself in. - How many Psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb ?
Just one. But the bulb has to really WANT to change.
So, let’s get started…
In the comments section below, post your answer to the question:
“How many Internet Marketers does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?”
Please note…
- ONE entry/joke per comment only, please… In the event that multiple jokes are posted in a comment, the comment will be moderated so that only the first will show up.
- If two identical comments are posted for the winning entry, the first commenter will be deemed the winner.
- Contest entry must be made on or before December 15th, 2007.
- The winner will be announced on December 16th, 2007.
Have FUN!! 
internet marketing course,joke,contest
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Comments
37 Responses to “Lightbulb Joke Contest: Win a Copy of “Insider Secrets To Marketing Your Business On The Internet””
Lara on November 28th, 2007 11:48 am
5000 to attend a conference
5 to stay fired up about it after coming home
and only 1 who realizes that you have to DO something to make it happen.
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Julie on November 28th, 2007 15:33 pm
Thousands have Googled about it, hundreds have blogged about it, but only one has ever succeeded in changing a lightbulb. He is now a millionaire!
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Julie on November 28th, 2007 15:37 pm
They don’t change lightbulbs. They just assume the bulb isn’t working due to user error and they rely on the glow from their computer.
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Griff on November 28th, 2007 17:50 pm
Ya know what? . . .
Yeah, he’s the guy that signs the lightbulbs. . .sometimes 60, sometimes 100. . .
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Beth on November 29th, 2007 18:22 pm
None, he outsources it.
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Pete on November 30th, 2007 2:43 am
Zero, because they outsource it!
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Lewis on December 4th, 2007 21:50 pm
ONLY ONE!… ME…ME…ME! And i’ll show you how exactly how i did it … you can see actual CEILING-SHOTS inside the “Super Screwer” Program… PLUS You will get my MEGA BONUS… yes… you can proudly own the very same bulb I have used successfully for the last 2 years ==> 40watter.hopesU.clickHISbank.net
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BOA Method on December 4th, 2007 21:57 pm
OOPS! Sorry that changed to an active link! :-S
Lewis
No fear Lewis… I took ‘em out.
Ros
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George on December 5th, 2007 12:17 pm
How many idiots does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two…One to hold the bulb and one to turn the ladder.
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Val on December 5th, 2007 12:31 pm
One to write the user manual, one to brag about it!
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Rebecca on December 5th, 2007 12:45 pm
Only one…me. I wrote the ebook, designed the blog, packaged the content, hosted the forum, created the membership site, planned the affiliate program and blasted the email to all my mastermind group, mentors and colleagues. I’d say, that the light is ON.
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Irvin on December 5th, 2007 12:54 pm
For the good ones, none their ideas are bright enough.
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Dean B Spurgeon on December 5th, 2007 13:00 pm
12-5-07
None. Rosalind has already left the light on for you.
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Carl Willoughby on December 5th, 2007 13:03 pm
“How many Internet Marketers does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?”
NONE… They’re already screwed.
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Dwight Larkins, Sr. on December 5th, 2007 13:05 pm
The answer is: NONE. They don’t do their own work. They have done such a good job learning Internet Marketing from absolute Pro’s like Rosalind Gardner, that they can hire someone to change it for them!
Blatant enough? =P
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Duane on December 5th, 2007 13:38 pm
As an internet marketing guru, you would have done your research and purchased lifetime lightbulbs.
Therefore, if the light looks like it needs to be changed, it is probably an
ID 10 T Error (ID10T)
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Louise on December 5th, 2007 13:47 pm
Two. One to train and one to learn and put it in action.
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Duke on December 5th, 2007 15:20 pm
It takes a 4-pack and sometimes more.
One non-research type who believes you get what you pay for and throws his MasterCard out to grab the first “guaranteed, can’t miss” $497.00 fairy tale program he sees.
A second who believes with the dozens of $97 affiliate specials to be found that surely grabbing 2 of those is smart because now he is armed with a double-barrelled shotgun and at only half the price!
The third already knows he is ahead of the game seeing the other 2 throw their money around so loosely so he figures it best to surf for hours and build a site with 1,001 affiliate links with no content, no blogs and, no customers.
Our fourth, having done diligent research of such programs available, accepts Roz as the affiliate guru based on her “conversion rates” of those who tried other programs first before recognizing they were get rich quick works written by guys who couldn’t market their way out of a supermarket brown bag if you cut the bottom out for them, and her fair market value price of $47.00 with a constant stream of emagazines and tips and more; then the light really goes on when, without even requiring a calculator she realizes by signing on as an affiliate and referring only 2 sales to Roz’ site she has entered the affiliate marketing foray at NO COST!
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Kyril on December 5th, 2007 16:14 pm
Q: How many Internet Marketers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: It doesn’t matter how many. What matters is that 99.9% of us are sick of and tired of taking the time to research the light bulbs, buy different light bulbs from different light bulb gurus, buy books and manuals on how to monetize the light bulbs that we’ve spent thousands of dollars on, getting coaching on how to screw in your ‘inner’ light bulb, getting light bulb affiliates, blowing wads of cash on a Light Bulb PPC campaign to try and pay the electric bill that this light bulb will eventually run up on us, determining the best wattage and voltage of the ‘perfect’ light bulb, fumbling around in the dark and bumping into the furniture that the AdSense and AdWord gurus keep rearranging on us, all in an effort to turn the damn light switch on so we can get what we want - light! Sadly, $15,000 and 2 years into it and my room is still dark. (But thanks for the opportunity for me to lay out what a ton of us feel.) I will white list this site so I can learn more from everyone here, and maybe someday I’ll get the light on!
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Dean on December 5th, 2007 17:20 pm
How many Internet Marketers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
To find out, just enter your name and email address in the box below and I”ll send you a copy of my FREE REPORT… “Lightbulb Secrets Exposed”
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Yati on December 5th, 2007 17:30 pm
Only one. But the bulb and the IM have to CLICK.
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bernie on December 5th, 2007 18:23 pm
How many Internet Marketers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
3
1 to google and search the product
1 to blog and email
1 to outsource and get ROI
and the light shines!!
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Karen on December 5th, 2007 18:38 pm
I can’t compete, Ros. Just give it up for Carl Willoughby right now.
Brilliant answer!
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dapo on December 5th, 2007 19:23 pm
first reply was bad, please use this one instead roz:
nahh i think kyril had the funniest answer, just didnt space it properly.
hey roz, maybe u should space kyril’s answer so it’s easier to read
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Hafiz on December 5th, 2007 20:41 pm
Don’t bother to screw in if you don’t pay the bill.
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Nikki on December 5th, 2007 22:07 pm
“How many Internet Marketers does it take to screw in a light bulb ?”
Statistically it takes two… the real question is, “How do they fit in the light bulb???”
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Mitch G on December 5th, 2007 23:07 pm
How many internet marketers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. Screwing in your own light bulb is a violation of Google’s TOS.
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Catalin on December 6th, 2007 1:07 am
The answer is definetely 0, for 2 reasons:
-no need for lightbulbs, the screen provides enough light:)
-the smart marketer will hire someone to do it for him/her
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Paul Legge on December 6th, 2007 7:38 am
That’s simple, one to pick up the phone and dial and the other to tell the ComEd rep to send out a service man. Better known as outsourcing.
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David Trujillo on December 6th, 2007 9:01 am
Hi Ros:
Its your old friend Dave, Happy Holidays to you and yours. Here is my entry:
How many presidential candidates does it take to screw in a light bulb? It takes 16 men to write down the instructions and 1 woman to tell them how to do it!
Your Friend Dave Trujillo
PS I keep saying we will get together one of these days. Merry Christmas
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Jason on December 6th, 2007 10:58 am
How many Irishmen does it take to change a light bulb? 2 - One to hold the bulb and one to drink til the room spins!
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Ayn Elise C. on December 6th, 2007 13:15 pm
3 internet marketers tried, but only 1 was sucessful because:
The 1st was a Blackhat and got banned from the lightbulb project entirely.
The 2nd was a Greyhat who couldn’t decide on the best method to use and gave up.
But the 3rd was a Whitehat who knew how to sucessfully change the lightbulb and spin it off into 3 other projects.
maybe not the best joke, but scores a little on karma and education….
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Hans on December 6th, 2007 21:41 pm
“How many Internet Marketers does it take to screw in a light bulb ?”
Only one —– If it isn’t broken —- don’t fix it, just turn on the light.
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Fred Sabens on December 7th, 2007 5:57 am
“How many Internet Marketers does it take to screw in a light bulb?”
None–because the light bulbs come on in their heads.
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Fran on December 7th, 2007 20:10 pm
Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?
No, big daddy, but hum a few bars and I’ll fake it.
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susan on December 10th, 2007 16:58 pm
I agree with those who answered with NONE - internet marketers outsourced it !!!!
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Jim Cady on December 11th, 2007 17:48 pm
“How many Internet Marketers does it take to SCREW in a lightbulb ?”
I doubt that an Internet Marketer would be able to fit into a light bulb,
& even if they could - I think the lack of space would make sex extremely uncomfortable.
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